Faith: a deeper intimacy
It is awesome when we truly bump into God, encounter what we have recited and claimed for year-that God is with us. Yet, when all those words, prayers, religious actions, inner feelings, bring us to a real encounter with God, often we may want to run away. We may feel unworthy, like Peter. Or just like Isaiah, filled with fear and dread when given a glimpse of God’s glory. Why is that?
One reason may be that we know there will be a price for that encounter of the divine presence with us. Most often, the price is the challenge for us to change, convert–go deeper and to get beyond the superficial way we may be living our relationships with others, including God. To turn our false control of our lives into the trust of God’s control over our lives is very scary. For we know that to accept God’s challenge means we must admit our failings, seek and accept living Jesus daily.
There are no easy options when we respond to the call from Jesus to follow him. For Jesus calls out to us to enter uncharted waters, to let go of the familiar patterns that we may have numbed our lives with, what seems like security to us, and enter where we would rather not go.
Why would he do that? To hurt us, no, but to convert us-into becoming all that we can become, even with our failings, just like Peter. It was not easy or automatic for Peter; we can relate to Peter’s denials of Jesus, for we do the same. We may feel unworthy, like Peter. We hear Peter’s reaction to the call of Jesus and may think his response was strange. After all, Peter got exactly what he wanted – a huge catch of fish. Yet, Peter’s response is, “Leave me Lord. I am a sinful man.” Peter fearfully sensed the consequences of being so intimately involved with Jesus. Peter became thoroughly aware of his own faults and failings he wanted to run away, frightened of what would happen to him if he stayed with Jesus. Peter encountered the divine side of life – our connectedness to God, and sensed that a change would be the price.
Yet Jesus continued to urge him into a deeper fuller life journey with him, an intimacy with him, and that invitation Jesus offers to us today. Jesus not only delivers us from our fears of inability, he transforms us to serve his mission through those same faults and limitations in us. Just as with Peter, Jesus uses our weakness to make us strong.
How many times have you experienced a problem or a crisis, feeling out of control, and faced with no other option, were forced to turn over the situation to trust in Jesus? What happened? Peace, release-filled inner peace – knowing that we are not in control and we are not alone. I see that so often in the sacramental life—especially when people are suffering.
It has been a blessing for me to pray with and for doctors, nurses, and the staff that serve many in our community. There have been times when I have been called into the operating room area by nurses and/or doctors to pray with them before a serious procedure—as they turn to God and ask that God work through the gifts given to them.
Each time I anoint someone with the Sacrament of the Sick –whether before surgery—or after—or during long term treatments or the surrender to aging, I also include prayers for doctors and nurses. The words of the blessing are so powerful:
“Through this holy anointing may the Lord in his love and mercy help you with the grace of the Holy Spirit, May the Lord who frees you from all sins save you and raise you up.” Then I pray. “Loving God, I have anointed your daughter (or son) with this holy oil in the sure and certain hope that through the skills and gifts you have given doctors and nurses he/she may be relived of illness and always rejoice in your love.”
We all rejoice in that love that God has for us. God’s call to us is a life of dependence on God; a continued call to go deeper and become more intimate with Him and with others. We come to answer the call to communion with God; we are given so many chances to do so during our week—even here. Will we answer like Isaiah: “here am I Lord” – open to do your will, open to change?
In the box: “– especially when people are suffering.”